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The Panera Bread "Family"
The Panera Bread Co. wants to convince you that their fast food restaurants are actually family restaurants. If you haven't noticed, they try to stimulate a "family feeling" by slipping some...
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The Sound of Muzak
As a young American participating in the brave new 'service economy', you will likely be subjected to some form of continuous Muzak.From retailers who blast away the better judgement of their consumers...
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Libertarian Priorities
By any metric, we are currently living in the most unfree period of American history. So it's good to know that the freedom-loving libertarians are out there, working for radical reform, addressing...
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Windows 8: Non Plus Ultra
Full disclosure: I used to think very highly of Steve Ballmer. This was around the time of his insane "Developers, developers, developers!" incantation at a Microsoft Family Meeting in 2000. But much...
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Overpaid Overseers
As the modern slave plantation of the NFL wraps up another season, this one marked by a drunken murder-suicide and capped by the retirement of an icon who believes God intervenes in his favor in...
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A Prebuttal to the Rubio Fantasy
Marco Rubio is the last hope for the Republican cause in America, according to his political opponents.After all, the first term senator has non-white ancestry, which makes for such a great story! I...
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First Black Pope?
Who will be the first Black Pope?No, I am not trying to cast a 1970s-style blaxploitation film like Black Gestapo.I am very serious here. For most Americans, this is not a question of if anymore, but...
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Taylor Swift Downgrades Herself
Poor Taylor Swift. The 23-year old 'country' pop singer who has been called "America's Sweetheart" and has been praised by comrades like Reese Witherspoon for being an "exemplary role model" and for...
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Child Beauty Pageants Get Creepier
'Child beauty pageants' have always been bizarre, but they recently crossed into the realm of science fiction, positing a model of beauty completely alien to the human race.Pageant mothers used to...
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The College Caste
The New York Times today decided to profile the self-fulfilling circularity of the educational and professional lives of young Americans.Once, one may have gone to college to become somebody: an...
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Life expectancy in the US continues to decline. What risky lifestyle choices could be responsible?Well, about 26% of American males smoke cigarettes, which isn't a high number on the global charts....
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Mayor Bloomberg's Video Game Finance
Mayor Bloomberg has been the object of populist scorn in recent months. The banker-mayor, with a net worth of over $25 billion, has taken to banning the sale of sodas larger than 16 ounces in his...
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Lauren Silberman: The End Of Womyn's 'History'
Today, ABC News treated us to the breathless announcement of 'the latest groundbreaking moment for women in sports, history in the making'. The NFL finally repented of its official policy banning...
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How to Become Famous: 7 Tips from a Pro
Do you want to be famous? Everyone does! But fame isn't for everyone. You have to really want to become famous. Just saying or thinking "I want to be famous" isn't enough. You have to become...
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Is He Dead?
That's the rather jovial question on everyone's mind over at People Of The CTA: One wonders: how many of the 1,000 and counting who have liked this photograph have heard presentations on...
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Prison Politics Go Mainstream
If you are ever unlucky enough to spend time in a US prison, you will probably end up joining a prison gang.You see, the US prison population has divided itself into large, nationwide gangs, distinct...
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Is Tiger Woods Back? Is Tiger Woods Happy?
Is Tiger Woods back? With his success early this season, the question returns to the forefront. It has been so much in the zeitgeist since the 'incidents' in 2009 that Google has indexed over 80,000...
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The Villages: Where Baby Boomer Delusions Die Hard
Imagine you were born some time around 1953. What was your childhood like? Dad drove a Studebaker he could actually finance. Mom managed to prepare nutritious meals without health campaigns run by...
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A Pre-Emptive Memorial to the Baby Boomers
For better (or worse), the Reign of the Baby Boomers is nearing its end. They are truly a special group of people, and their passing deserves special treatment. Even though most of them are now members...
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China: The Paper Chicken
Due to the shape of the country, China is often referred to by native Chinese as "the chicken." And the central city of Xi'an is commonly referred to as "the heart of the chicken." See for yourself...
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